Monday, November 16, 2009

Dinner Language Etiquette for Dummies and Negros

Heard you Miss the Peaches to your Cream,
As a negro myself, I have often encountered questionable situations in which my language choices have been compromised. Mostly, I find that my language is challenged at distinguished dinner parties. Then, one night while sleeping in the nude with no blankets on because my rippled muscles keep me warm (my body is like a ripple chip, you know its delicious, but you also know I'm going to be spending the next three weeks in your bum), it hit me, I should write a book about all this debotchery! So I did. Here's a tasty niblet of: How to Use Words Good, by Foxy.
[Some words such as "Butt paste" and "Proctoscope" are only sometimes okay to use all the time, so use your own discretion. Don't use the word "bifrocate", it is a fickle mistress. There are many words you have to be careful with, it is completely unacceptable to say someone 'Gurgles Diapers', unless of course you have a picture proving that that statement is true. As far as the words "butt paste" are concerned, be sure to only use it if you are speaking about a skin ailment of sorts on the rear region, or else it could make you look unintelligible.]
Whoa! If that isn't wisdom, I don't know what is!

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